The Ripple Effect That Gives Me Hope

As I sat warming up the car, I watched how literally backpacks, a clarinet, percussion mallets, lunchboxes, and water bottles were thrown into the car. Followed by two kids throwing themselves into the car and landing in a heap on the seat. It had been a rough morning.

The energy was palpable and I paused for a moment before putting the car in gear and thought, how can I best serve my kids in this moment?

My twins are now 12 years old, polar opposites in so many ways, especially when faced with stress. One is hell on wheels and lashes out and blames others, while the other is soft and squishy inside and completely shuts down. Both scenarios have similar effect on their nervous system yet expressed differently.

Our drive to school was good. We honored the difficult morning as they reflected on how stress was showing up for them. Awareness on how stress made them feel in their body. We went over the steps as they they have the power to decide to not carry the stress from the morning with them throughout the rest of their day. A shift in mindset of how they wanted to feel as they walk into school. It was a beautiful BodyMind mini reset in the car.

On my drive back home, I felt hope.

Hope because my kids are learning how to regulate their nervous system. Such a vast difference from when I was a kid as feelings were not allowed so the messaging was suck it up and push through. That was the expectation and I learned and mastered it well. Part of this “toughness” served me when I was a jockey, an athlete, to later building my own business. But it wrecked havoc on my nervous system which over time greatly led to compounding health issues.

So, I dove into study with more school and training with the quest to better understand and heal myself. Recognizing that the old messaging of the past only created a disconnect from myself and did not serve me. I had to re-learn how to regulate my nervous system. Creating new neural pathways in response to stress that would support me wholly.

Living my work, staying grounded, being that steady beacon for my kids, is something I am most proud of. Me doing my work has had a profound ripple effect on them since they benefit from a mom who is more present with herself and in turn them. It is a win win as it deepens our connection to each other. 

There will always be stress in life. For my kids, learning how to navigate stress, healthy ways to nurture their nervous system, gives me great hope for their future and their ability to receive heartfelt joy!